For five days now, I have been sad, for reasons I could not even understand. I came up with a lot of possible explanations to make myself feel better, the result, my two earlier blogs, but personally, I didn't feel any shit better.
And it took only a couple of minutes of a seemingly trifle conversation with a good friend of mine to give me a facelift. This whole semester I was behaving just the way, I didn't want to. I didn't see what I was becoming. Maybe I was blind. I was cutting myself off from the friends I have in NITC, behaving as though I was some high funda intellectual, not really maintaining contact with the people around. My earlier profile picture summarised this attitude of mine with an uncharacteristic smirk. I didn't like being like that and thus my mind started sending distress signals, yet I didn't notice.
I was turning into a wannabe, a person who I am not, just based on baseless assumptions and desires on being different. I don't want to be different. I don't want to be an enigma. Inherently I am a simple person, looking to have fun in simple ways with other simple friends. I need to cut the crap, just be who I am, smile and not smirk, and once again seriously feel I belong here.
And it took only a couple of minutes of a seemingly trifle conversation with a good friend of mine to give me a facelift. This whole semester I was behaving just the way, I didn't want to. I didn't see what I was becoming. Maybe I was blind. I was cutting myself off from the friends I have in NITC, behaving as though I was some high funda intellectual, not really maintaining contact with the people around. My earlier profile picture summarised this attitude of mine with an uncharacteristic smirk. I didn't like being like that and thus my mind started sending distress signals, yet I didn't notice.
I was turning into a wannabe, a person who I am not, just based on baseless assumptions and desires on being different. I don't want to be different. I don't want to be an enigma. Inherently I am a simple person, looking to have fun in simple ways with other simple friends. I need to cut the crap, just be who I am, smile and not smirk, and once again seriously feel I belong here.
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